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[personal profile] chasingkerouac
Title: Chevaliers
Section: 2, Man of Faith
Rating/Genre: PG, Gen
Fandom: Stargate Atlantis
Characters: Rodney McKay, Kate Heightmeyer
Length: 719
Exerpt: The others may not believe me when I say it, but I stand by my diagnosis. Rodney McKay is a man of faith.

A/N: Chevaliers is a group of seven ficlets surrounding what are known as 'knightly virtues'. All contain a female expedition member speaking of one of the men.




Faith: (n) Allegiance to duty or a person or something that is believed especially with strong convictions.

Rodney McKay is a man of faith. My colleagues are surprised every time I make that statement, and I don’t blame them. I had much the same reaction after my own revelation. I don’t speak of it much anymore, save for my personal notes on his rare visits and even rarer formal sessions. The others may not believe me when I say it, but I stand by my diagnosis.

Rodney McKay is a man of faith.

It’s not the typical faith one associates with the turn of phrase. As far as I’m aware, Rodney never had a burning desire to join the clergy of whatever religion he subscribes to, if there ever was one. He’s not a saint or a holy man, no sage or shaman. He’s rarely wise and is an exceedingly dreary source of council concerning anything outside of his academic field. His faith is not traditional, but it is there.

Rodney has faith in himself. Most construe this as arrogance and intellectual narcissism. It goes much deeper than that. It’s more than a face of confidence. He has true faith in himself and his abilities.

He has faith in his intelligence. Rodney studied long and hard to know what he knows today. He brushes it off as coming easily to him, but I’ve seen his file. I know more than he wishes for me to know. Rodney is a continual student, absorbing the world around him and quickly categorizing this new information with the knowledge and experience to know that it may very well become useful later. Any small, insignificant piece of information that he can recall quite possibly could be the difference between life and death for him or someone he knows. It would not be the first time this has happened. But he has faith that he knows enough to see us through.

He has faith in his ability to take this wealth of knowledge that he possesses and make choices. Important choices. Quick, life and death choices. He has developed faith in his instincts, and these instincts have only grown over time, regardless of setbacks. I’ve watched this faith stumble and falter, and each time he allows me to, I attempt in my own small way to set it back on course.

Lately he has developed another faith. One that he will not speak of to the others or to me even in the most private of sessions. Those of us who had the misfortune of meeting him previous to the Atlantis mission, no matter how brief the encounter, have a hard time believing me when I tell them. I don’t think that he realizes it himself, but Rodney has developed a faith in others. It may be so hidden that he can’t see it in himself, or he doesn’t trust his reaction enough to look for it in himself, or he may just be afraid to admit it to himself. But I see it. He now has faith in others, in his team.

I can see it in his eyes and in the way he speaks and interacts with them. He’s no longer looking down on Radek as beneath him, but as someone he can depend on to run his labs when he’s off-world. He’s no longer looking down on the Colonel as a “stupid military grunt”, but as someone whose word he can trust. When Colonel Sheppard says that he’s going to bring his team home, he will. Rodney has faith in those words now. He’s no longer looking down on Ronon and Teyla as “backwater galactic hicks” – one of the more interesting turns of phrase I’ve heard here – but as trustworthy warriors who have faith in his abilities. This faith is reciprocated by a faith of his own that they will trust and act on his expertise.

He may not realize this. He may never admit it. Others may tell me that I imagine things in him because I want to see him as more than the anti-social grump that he is, or that I’m only trying to find a thread of good in everyone. Regardless of what they say, I have to believe what I see, so I stand by my statement. Rodney McKay is a man of faith.

And his faith encourages me to have faith in him.



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Chevaliers: Hope Faith Courage Generosity Justice Mercy Nobility

Date: 2006-02-20 08:40 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] noctuabunda.livejournal.com
Wow. I like this character analysis. And I'm not one to argue with Kate! :)
Just read "Hope", too, don't know how I could miss it, and have to say, that's even more intense than Faith! Good work. Can't wait to see the next part.

Date: 2006-02-21 11:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chasingkerouac.livejournal.com
Glad you enjoyed it! And yes, Kate is one people should listen to. She's a joy to write too *lol*

Date: 2006-02-21 11:22 pm (UTC)

Date: 2006-02-23 02:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] 4amcoffee.livejournal.com
I commented on the first one, and all of those apply here. Plus, I love your Kate voice. She is an intelligent and underused woman in a cast of men.

Date: 2006-02-23 04:35 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chasingkerouac.livejournal.com
Thank you :) I enjoy her so, and she really should get more airtime.

Date: 2006-02-24 04:30 pm (UTC)
ext_9374: Stargate - SG10 (Atlantis - I'm With Genius)
From: [identity profile] ryf.livejournal.com
Oh, this is even better than the Carson one. So much love for your writing :)

Date: 2006-03-10 05:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chasingkerouac.livejournal.com
Thank you so much :) And side note, I adore your icon.

Date: 2006-04-28 09:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aleana15.livejournal.com
I've read both this one and the Carson one and really enjoyed them. They're brilliant character explorations and a different way of seeing them.

Well done and looking forward to the rest

Date: 2006-04-29 12:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chasingkerouac.livejournal.com
I'm so glad you're enjoying them, because they're such a joy for me to write. I just posted the Ronon one, which let me write a local legend/myth to go with it which was a lot of fun.

And I love the sheep in your icon. It's just adorable *has a soft spot for sheep*

Date: 2006-04-29 09:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aleana15.livejournal.com
Yeah a fellow sheep fan! lol It was made for me by a friend - she humors me.

Oh I like myths and legends so I'll make a point of reading the Ronon one soon.

Date: 2006-04-29 11:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chasingkerouac.livejournal.com
Nothing wrong with humoring when it involves sheep.

I got fascinated by your sheep, so I thought I should post with my own sheep icon. A little sheep solidarity or something to that effect. *lol*

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